The Teen Titans Read Fanmail
by AjStarlet
Summary: THE ORIGINAL LAST CHAPTER! THE SEASON TWO PREMIERE! The Titans read fanmail as a new, cunning villain comes into their lives. No, not Armando. Or his twerking. Or Nasenloch with her thwacking braids. Enjoy! BBRae, RobStar.


****THIS IS THE ORIGINAL LAST CHAPTER OF TTRFM!**

**If you guys have any screenshots or downloads of any of my stories, I would be very thankful! :) If it's TTRFM it's going on here, because that was the start of everything. Everything else goes onto WriteMyStars.**

**EVERYTHING DOWN BELOW IS THE ORIGINAL WRITING! Funny how I talked about you guys helping me and how I would never want my friends to find me...IT WAS A SIIIIIGN. ENJOY!****

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**Hi.**

**Updates on me-**

**1. SCHOOL IS OVER AND IT'S SCARY. I was always the youngest child in my family, always told I was so young and a little kid. So when I was like, "Oh, I'm going into high school-"**

**I went, "Wait...I could have sworn I just started middle school-"**

**NO. NOPE. It's weird. I changed a lot during middle school. I'm just a child, I know, man, I know. But you still learn a lot. No, not how to take selfies or to have your first kiss. Hell no. I'm not normal, remember? HAHAHHA, like you guys would ever forget my weirdness. I feel like I've scarred you all.**

**2. My book...I love my characters I want to hug them and make them real and hang out with them and feed them cookies. Sadly, I have this thing where I like making things turn dark and for a death to happen so oops. If you've read my other A/Ns or profile, then you know how I talked about my journey of writing a book. So I'm on chapter three. Me: Wow why does it take authors so long to publish books like-**

**BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO BUILD YOUR OWN WORLD AND MAKE SURE THE PLOT STAYS FRESH AND DOESN'T GROW OLD AND PATCH UP THE PLOT HOLES AND MAKE GOOD CHARACTERS AND NECESSARY VILLAINS THAT MAKE SENSE AND YET SQUEEZE IN HUMOR AND TRY NOT TO MAKE ANYTHING CLICHE AND HOLY CRIDDLE CRADDLES. Fanfiction is hot, greasy, steamy chicken on a plate and you only have to pour your water in your cup but writing your own story that you want to sell and actually publish is like making soup. From scratch. With exotic vegetables you have to climb through the depths of Africa to find. I'm good with writing and prompts and all; making things up from scratch. I do it everyday and my head is full of them. I have a theory that my hair grows so fast because they're my thoughts and daydreams struggling to get out of my head. Totally. But a book is mental stress. Shaping it to stand tall. It's very fun, though! You just spill ink then clean it up. BUT THEN THE HARD STUFF JUST SWEEPS IN AND UGHRH. **

**3. I might turn it into a free eBook after I'm done!**

**4. I started watching _Merlin _about a month ago...I wanted to watch a season a day...but I wanted to draw it out. So I'm almost done with the series. I AM SO SCARED TO FINISH IT I LOVE IT SO MUCH I HAVENT FELT LOVE FOR SOMETHING THIS GREAT HOLY SKITTLES.**

**IF ANY OF MY REVIEWERS HAVE WATCHED THIS SHOW;**

**Isn't Merlin adorable like whoa stop being so awesome thank you**

**AND;**

**I'VE HEARD PEOPLE HAVE CRIED INTENSELY AT THE FINALE. DID YOU? SDKJAK**

**5. So...I've been waiting to do this for five years...I'm going to try do something more significant in my life besides writing a novel. On here I spill out everything, because writing is one of the four forms in which I express myself. if you knew me in real life, all you would know is my weirdness BECAUSE IT IS THE ONLY EMOTION I CAN EXPRESS. It's physically impossible for me to talk about myself unless I'm writing. This is also one of the reasons I make sure NO ONE IN REAL LIFE finds THIS account with all my A/N's. I once sent some fics to my friends tho without the link and A/Ns, like screenshotting and they never knew which website. I talked about writing fanfiction, I'm not embarrassed. I just feel so...fragile if anyone knew my actual thoughts or dkjskajk anywhosers; making videos and filmmaking is another way to express myself.**

**People.**

**I am coming to YouTube. Beware. **

**Later this summer, however, because I need to experiment on how I'll do it. The popular YouTubers usually just use their looks and cool camera quality. HAHAHA. I don't have any of those. So I'll use my bookwormness and humor perhaps, and drawing skillz and PLAIN AWESOMENESS to lure people into being my minion muffin stars.**

**MWAHAHAHAHA.**

**I'm so normal. **

**EYYY! If you wanna watch this video I made for my class, it's on YouTube and I'm really proud of it; It's called "Story of my Life Project" by imaginewithaj. :3 I have like 3090290 different YouTube accounts, I know. But I'm going to try to actually INVEST TIME in it. **

**5. ****Okay how do I urmf say this...**

**It's been a little over a year since I joined. May seventeenth 2013. A year ago, I was some obnoxious seventh grader who had somewhat of a grasp on what I knew I was doing, and I was so confused and scared because of something that was happening in real life, and I was getting over something traumatic that happened.**

**You guys knew me as funny and weird with that random Spanish homosexual guy in her fanfictions. It was amazing how it clicked though; my fingers on the keyboard with your guys' laughs. My days wrapped around just living in another world. It slowly got me back up. It slowly taught me something;**

**I knew that I wanted to be a filmmaker and maybe even an author when I grew up, ever since I was nine. But then I found out...I wanted to be a storyteller. Make people laugh or cry, with my visuals or words. I encourage you, if you see something that can distract you from hard times (not drugs okay thank you) please go for it. You meet incredible people and you become incredible.**

**I couldn't smile correctly 365 days ago. But a lot can happen with a click of a button or with strangers on the internet telling you that you have something inside of you that made them feel happy or special.**

**This is so cheesy. Heh sorry. What I mean is;**

**It's been almost three years since something bad happened in my life. It's been almost two years since I've figured out the truth about things. It's been a year since I started a new chapter. It's been a couple months since I've finally spoken up that I was depressed. Admitted it aloud to someone, even if it was subtle. I still sometimes find myself staring into space thinking dark thoughts. Then I remember you guys and God and my family; I quickly get back to writing; my escape that you guys helped pull open.**

**So here's to my heroes. Here's to the people that are amazing by making you feel invincible. You guys save others; including me. You guys are my heroes.**

**Fanfiction is just a silly thing where you write stories about things that are already stories. But it depends on where you do it and how. Sometimes the little laughs in life take you to the light. **

**So let's get back to the comedy, shall we?**

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**Disclaimer:**

**I don't own the Teen Titans. I actually put one of my book characters into this...they aren't as crazy as they are in here but I *modified* them a bit cuz this is TTRFM. What do you expect?**

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**Highlight of the Chapter:**

"Beast Boy," Raven began and looked intensely into his eyes, sincerity bubbling up in her purple orbs, hoping to get him to just believe in the truth of the world... "Shut up." She then floated away without a care in the world, because she is Raven.

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**The Teen Titans Read Fan-Mail**

**Season 2 Premiere!**

**By AjStarlet**

Their heartbeats matched the engine on the subway, breaths slowing to the steady of sleep. However, one passenger's eyelids did not droop. Their breaths did not slow down into slumber. Their eyes looked straight ahead, lips pursed. It was two A.M. in the down skirts of the underground train systems of Jump City, but they had bigger plans than ever.

And those plans involved the Teen Titans.

As the underground subway halted to its next stop, Ruby Goldlock stepped off onto the platroom, the darkness casting over her face. How could she sleep, with her brain calculating something big, something that could change a country, or even the world, forever?

Her bright crimson lips twisted up into a sinister smirk as she continued walking out into the night from the tunnel, to her destination.

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Beast Boy snored peacefully, or yet, very disturbingly and in guttural snorts, as a knock on his window came. He stirred just a bit, but his snoring amplified. His body twisted under his sheets in the darkness of his room as the knocking became louder.

His mind began to become conscious, and he sat up tiredly, rubbing the crust from his eyes. He licked his lips, his tongue accidentally running over his fang, and it began to bleed. "Aw...Oh God no, why - WHY NOW?" he grumbled. The knocking came up once again, and his irritation turned into nervousness.

"H-hello?" he squeaked out, as if the knocker would come out to him and friendly wave. Beast Boy's nose then wrinkled. "I swear to you, if you are Armando, I WILL HURT SOMETHING. MOSTLY LIKELY YOU."

A face revealed itself as the break of dawn approached. The quarter of the sun lit up their porcelain face, and blood red lips. Their big blue eyes stared back into Beast Boy's green ones, taunting him to come to her. Another thing that caught his eye and he could see of this mysterious woman was a mess of wild, golden hair that surrounded her head like a freaking cloud.

"What the actual-?"

She caught him off as she creepily and slowly knocked on the window. "Open," she mouthed.

Beast Boy shook his head. "I am _not_ opening my five story window up to a random woman with lion hair! This isn't a scary movie, you lard!" he cried.

"Beast Boy?" Robin's voice called, Beast Boy's voice had been awakening him. The golden girl with the blood lips disappeared swiftly from view. "Are you alright?"

"OH HOLY- WHERE DID SHE GO? _WHERE DID THAT FREAKING CREEPY LADY GO?"_

"Slade?!" Robin cried hopefully.

"DOES SLADE LOOK LIKE A LADY TO YOU?"

"Eh. It's hard to tell. With the mask and stuff - you never know - but anyways, what's going on? Open the door!"

Beast Boy mumbled angrily as he got up to get the door. "People always tellin' me to open stuff now." He opened the door, and Robin revealed to be...THE CREEPY BLONDE LADY!

He screamed and fell down as her golden locks fell behind her, masking the background view. Her lips curled menacingly, and she towered over him in her yellow, long coat, sharp nails reaching out-

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Beast Boy woke up around late morning, panting from his nightmare. He ran quickly out of the door to check, sweating profusely. He found no one, sighed of relief, then gasped and turned around to check the window and found no one there either.

In his TARDIS boxers, he ran down to the common room, where all his team members were. There sat the CREEPY BLONDE LADY! EXCEPT HER HAIR WASN'T LIKE A FREAKING CLOUD OR LION ANYMORE!

"HOLY FREAKING BEARDS!" Beast Boy cried out, and ran over to Raven who was leaning on the counter. He hid under her cloak, shaking.

Her cheeks burned from embarrassment as she saw him in his boxers, and she pushed him out of her cloak, eyes burning with anger. Beast Boy squeaked again and hid under the counter, trying to relax but his heart thumped too hard and rapidly.

"I see your friend is shy," the lady said to Robin, her eyelids drooping in a relaxed manner - something Beast Boy could not do in that moment. She got up and so did Robin as they shook hands. "I hope you'll consider my deal...?"

Robin gave a firm nod. "Ignore his random behavior, and I'll definitely think about it," he told her with a playful but hopeful grin.

"DO NOT THINK ABOUT IT ROBIN," Beast Boy yelled. "THINK ABOUT SUNSHINE AND UNICORNS BUT NOT ANYTHING SHE TELLS YOU AW GEEZ."

"You know," the lady called over the counter to Beast Boy as the other Titans watched with confusion. "I like _Dr. Who_." Then she left the room to exit the building.

"Was that supposed to relax me?!" Beast Boy cried. "IT DIDN'T, DUDE!"

Cyborg pulled Beast Boy from behind the counter. "What's wrong with chu?!" he demanded, concerned but irritated.

Beast Boy pouted, his fang even more visible now. "That creepy blonde lady was in my nightmare!"

"Your DNA is mixed in with animals'. Some animals actually do dream, and can be prophetic. Maybe you just sensed her," Raven suggested.

"WHY WAS SHE TRYING TO MURDER ME THEN?" Beast Boy shouted.

Starfire frowned. "If Beast Boy feels this negative towards her, perhaps she is not a very trusted ally after all, Robin."

"Why? Allies? What were you discussing?" Beast Boy asked.

Robin was hesitant. Beast Boy would probably freak out. "Well...her name is Scarlet Yellowkey and she was wondering if she could stay here for a few days to shoot a documentary about us."

"SHE'S GOING TO STAY HERE?! WILL YOU TAKE MY CLICHE MOVIE NIGHTMARE PROPHECY TO LIGHT AND REALIZE SHE ISN'T TO BE TRUSTED?!"

"Calm down, B," Cyborg said. "She's a cool girl."

"NO, NO SHE IS NOT."

"Beast Boy," Raven began and looked intensely into his eyes, sincerity bubbling up in her purple orbs, hoping to get him to just believe in the truth of the world... "Shut up." She then floated away without a care in the world, because she is Raven.

Robin raised an eyebrow at Raven, then turned back to Beast Boy. "Consider this, Beast Boy. Also, put on your uniform. No one wants to find out how your TARDIS looks like."

* * *

It was now Friday night, a day and a half after the CREEPY BLONDE LADY had wormed into Beast Boy's life.

"Wow, season two of our webshow already," Cyborg mumbled as they settled into their usual seats. "Can't wait." He was being sarcastic. Sadly, there is not a font for that (**A/N: for my book I made a font for it. NO REGRETS).**

"It's been a year since we started it," Robin said. "Ugghh when will we finish?"

Chris squatted in.

"Why are you doing butt lunges in our tower?" Beast Boy awkwardly asked.

"Tryna flex it more," Chris answered, now crabwalking. He got back up and set up the cameras. "Excited?"

Robin scowled. "I thought I fired you!"

"HAHAHAH. No."

Starfire frowned. "Where are our fanmail bags-?"

Scarlet Yellowkey walked in, smiling brightly, throwing the heavy bags of fan letters on Starfire. "There!" she answered to Starfire, who was now stuffed under a pile of fanmail. Robin glared at Scarlet and helped Starfire out. "Oh, sorry, didn't mean to throw it at you. Oops."

"SHE WAS RIGHT THERE," Beast Boy shouted.

"So am I, so stop screaming," Scarlet snapped. "I have to go get my camera for my one-woman documentary." She left and came back in a flash.

"Can we start?" Cyborg whined. "I wanna get this over wiiiiith."

Everyone waited for the red light to flick on. It did, and Beast Boy, whose frown turned upside down with the camera on, howled. "HEEEEEEEEYYYY!" he greeted. "Welcome back to SEASON TWO!"

"Whoo!" Starfire cheered to get her teammates more enthusiastic.

"Whoo," Raven grumbled.

"Let us begin!" Cyborg said dramatically, then tore into a fanmail letter.

_"Dear Cyborg,_

_You. Are. A. Cyborg. Too?_

_Let. Us. Destroy. The. Humans._

_-Dalek"_

Robin sighed. "The fandoms cannot be contained in this show," he muttered.

"What is a 'fandom'?" Starfire asked, her innocent mind wandering off to curious places in which one should never, ever venture off to.

Raven exhaled seriously. "It's the remedy to every illness yet the disease to everything you are. It is the build up and destruction of you. It is the most beautiful yet terrifying thing you have seen. It's been through wars and romance and cliffhangers and tears. But mostly...it's full of..." Raven leaned into the shuddering and scared Starfire's ear, "_...feels."_

Starfire screeched and jumped into Robin's arms at that point.

Beast Boy, Cyborg, Robin, and Scarlet were disturbed. "Kaaay then," Beast Boy mumbled after a bit of silence.

_"Dear Beast Boy, _

_Pie. Pie. Pie, pie, pie, pie, pie, pie, pie, pie, pie, pie, pie, pie._

_Pie._

_-The Pie Guy"_

Beast Boy wrinkled his nose. "What is this? Poetry by Gary?"

"The Pie Guy?" Starfire murmured. "That has such a delightful ring to it! Is he a superhero with the enjoyable desert?"

"What would his outfit be?" Raven asked sarcastically against Starfire.

The Ops door opened to reveal a young boy with big blue eyes and black hair stuffed inside a pie costume. He was a giant pie. "I AM KAI THE PIE GUY!" he whooped. He sprayed jelly from guns. Cherry jelly.

"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUDGEPIE?!" Beast Boy gasped out.

"Did someone say, 'FUDGEPIE'?!" the Pie Guy cheered. He took out some sweet fudge pie and twerked with it.

Scarlet sat by as the chaos ensued. Her eyes widened. Is...is this how their lives were? Oh, they should be lucky that she was ending them.

_Mweheh._

"What the hell even is this?!" Cyborg yelled. "WHY IS THERE A LIVING PIE IN OUR LIVING ROOM, TWERKING?!"

"I love torturing them so much," Chris chuckled, went over to Kai, and paid him fifty bucks. "Thanks, bud."

"Wait...I WAS GETTING PAID?!" the Pie Guy exclaimed. "HELLA HELLA! MORE UVA BONUS! I was fine just struttin' and squattin' around in pie, ya know?"

"Ohmigosh, I _love _squatting!" Chris squealed.

"I know, right? Gets your butt muscles movin' and perking up."

Robin's eye twitched beneath his mask. "CAN YOU SQUAT YOUR PIE BUTT OUT OF HERE?"

The Pie Guy smiled widely. "Sure can!" he said, and exited by squatting.

"I really didn't mean actual squat - oh, never mind," Robin grumbled.

Raven sighed. Just another usual night of fanmail.

_"Dear Raven,_

_Life is just so, ugh. I just wanna sit at homez...AND CUT MASELF...even though I have no reason to...and some people actually do it seriouslyz and I should be gr8fulz and try to help those in needz...BUT I STILL WANNA CUT MAHSELF. My mom stolez my eyeliner..._

_"You're a fifteen-year-old boy, Mark," she told me. I grunted in response. I grunt a lot. "STOP STEALING MY EYELINER."_

_Correction...she threw it out...but I got it out of the trash and tore out the lead...AND USED IT ON MAH FACE...ungh._

_Raven...you're so-z emo...like ME. Help me, fellow emo. I'm in deep, tormented, painz. I tried running away to live my life as an emo refugee and express my angst, seeking helpz at the best place possible, for my kindz and I. But my family found me within ten minutez at the local Hot Topic store..._

_Ungh._

_And be4 I could buy some fake piercingz..._

_Life is just so...ungh._

_-Mark...but call me Thorn Murderface Bleedingflowers"_

Raven pursed her lips. "I am not a haven for you hormonal teenagers," she said. "And don't cut yourself when some people actually do it because they feel like they have to and not for attention! That's just so vile!"

"I am sorry, but what is up with all of the 'z's?" Starfire asked. "And why would he cut himself...? Huh?" **(A/N: whilst speaking with my sisters, I found out the emo kids at their school during junior high repeatedly used unecessary Z's, EVEN DURING HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENTS, and I've seen it before online. Just...how about NO?)**

"Just be glad you don't have emo Tamaranians. It's a sad sight here on earth," Beast Boy replied.

All but Starfire sighed. Even Scarlet, as she continued filming them.

Starfire cleared her throat for her turn.

_"Dear Starfire,_

_LET ME SING TO YOU IN HIGH PITCHED NOISES IN WHICH FOR SOME REASON PEOPLE THINK ARE CUTE;_

_HEAD IH THA CLUH GOT NO WEIGH OH MY SHOULDA, I SHUH BE WISER UNH REALIZE THA I GUH!_

_-Ariana Grande"_

"Is this another type of Earthern music form in which you do not finish the sentences you sing, and in incoherent words?" Starfire asked. This night was just a big ball of curious culture for the poor girl.

"Please do not Avril Lavigne it in ten years, Ariana," Raven said.

"What? What did she do?" Beast Boy questioned.

Cyborg and Raven had seen the Hello Kitty video...they shared grim glances. "It is better...if you do not know," Cyborg said darkly.

Robin cleared his throat to move along with the show.

_"Dear Robin,_

_LOL r u Robin cuz ur Robin my heart._

_-Tiff"_

"Puns," Robin said in a nasty voice. He looked back up. "Well, that's all the time we have today! Thanks for watching, and see ya next week!"

As the cameras clicked off, the Titans began to get up to relax and spend the next week ignoring the webshow. Stupid contract that won't allow them to end it. (Stupid author that forces them to go through crap)

Beast Boy stretched and yawned, already beat down. He didn't notice how Scarlet left the tower. Nobody did.

DUN DUN DUUUUN.

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**I hope this was funny enough. As I writing the last parts of this, something down just happened in real life. I apologize for rushing. **

**Guys...take this advice;**

**Don't ever be friends with someone who tells you to "stop". When they only use you as entertainment, and when they don't want to respond to it, they just tell you to stop being yourself or ignore you or are too lazy to. If they can't handle you when you are giving a piece of your happiness to them, then they can't ever handle all of your pieces. Don't give them anymore of it. Be friends with the people that embrace it. **

**Thank you.**

**~Aj x**

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****END OF ORIGINAL PIECE****

**Oh, that friend I was talking about in the end A/N was the friend that sent this to everyone. DANG THESE A/NS WERE JUST FORESHADOWING EVERYTHANG.**

**Oooooh, life. **

**Hope you enjoyed the memories in this. :)**


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